The Writing Bible

Think me crazy, but I have stories in my head. Three to four months at the least and fifty years at the most of moments of people's lives thrive in my thoughts on a daily basis. I can see different worlds, different lives, and very similar characters, witch for some reason have chosen to live through me. Some would consider it a curse having these things constantly nagging at your attention. A few people might envy me and wish to hear these voices in their head so they wouldn't be as lonely. I have lived with both of these opinions, but another seems to live above the rest.

I am unique. That is why these stories are in my head. I don't know how other people are, I've only lived as me. If I want to feel a part of something, I will tell myself that I am of a select race of people that were chosen to write stories for a living, or for a hobby, or to save their life, or to get the voices out of their head. If I want to feel alone and special, I will tell myself that no one in their wildest dreams could write the stories I have playing in my head. Then I will replay all the memories where someone praises me for my writing, and raise my chin, sit in smugness and relish in the thought that no one is as good as me. Then come the bad days. The days where I feel trapped in a loud screamo concert I didn't want to attend in the first play. The days I shoot at my self-esteem with a revolver loaded with hurtful truths aimed to kill.

Writing is...It just is for me. The other night I sat down and wrote exactly ten pages. I have my moods and times when that happens. I write with a thunder never seen before. Three days later I am doing something else. My style of writing is a sprinter in a cross country race. It may be really good in the first leg, but it won't reach the end. I'm hoping to change that.

As much as I do not want to be in debt when I'm older, or get breast cancer in my 40's, I don't want to be one of those people that say they are going to write, and write fabulous books but ends up with a lot of journals and nothing published. I don't want to be Susie's mom in Rugrats: All Grown Up looking back at a record nostalgically and wishing she would have continued her career as an R&B singer. I want to publish stories, and have them heard from people around the country or maybe even the world. Recognition is always welcome, but getting them out is my priority.

That has always been a struggle of mine, getting a story out on paper; and it's not a quiet problem either. I tell my parents, my best writing friend and almost anyone I trust with my writing secrets. Recently I have been reading a book by Stephen King called On Writing. In it he guides the audience through different ways to improve their own writing. I haven't quite figured out if it' helpful yet, but it really is a good read. If you are interested in writing at all then I advise you to check it out. Hopefully it will help you, and hopefully it will even help me.