View From the Shadows

Last year I ran for Senior Class President. I have always been a people person, I enjoy talking to people and I like fulfilling their needs. Most of my high school career involved a leadership role and with that and my strong connections with people I felt a shoo-in for class president. Many of you know the story, but when the votes were all counted, not only was I not Senior Class President, but I wasn't invited to be a part of the Senior Student Council. The day that two of my closest friends received their invitation to the council without me was one of the hardest days of my life. I'm well aware that this is not a life or death, live or starve situation, but for me it was hard. For most of my life things have come easy for me, and if they didn't, I chose not to like them or participate. I was selfish, and wanted to be the best of the best without putting any work in. This exclusion from something I felt entitled to was a harsh wake-up call for me. I had never felt the heavy blow of rejection hit me so hard before. For a few weeks, I tried not to mention it. In the following weeks I learned to be happy for my friends, and attempted to hide my hurt by asking about the meetings and the activities they were doing. By that time, I was able to see that my exclusion could be a blessing in disguise.

Last year, I was a HOSA officer. I got to wear the blue jacket, sit at the table during the academy meetings and even have bragging rights. To the outside world, I looked like a great officer, but inside to the officers, I was one of the worst. Part of my responsibility was to publish a newsletter every month. There are twelve months in a year, nine in a school year, and I published two. I always tried to be involved, but when I volunteered to head a committee, either my approach did not meet someone's standards, or it was done too late. A successful leader does not possess these qualities. They follow through with their goals, and do as much or more work than their subordinates. I didn't. Based on my performance last year, I don't deserve to be in Senior Student Council.

For those of you that know me, you are all aware that time is my vice. My time management skills are so horrendous that if left up to me things would never get done. The simple fact is, I am involved in too many things, and cannot balance them. Now, I am too stubborn and prideful to limit myself to a few things. I like to be involved in everything, and often that is detrimental. Being involved in everything leaves you time for nothing. I believe people know this about me, and in an attempt to help, kept me out of Senior Student Council. This year to put it bluntly my Capstone project is to be the student manager of the SCOPE project. This means that I will be spending the majority of my time giving presentations to middle school students, and I will train students about how to present on the signature academies at their school.This is going to take a lot of work and I need to focus on this project. Not participating in the Senior Student Council would enable me to do just that. So I have made a decision.

I will not be a major part of the Council. I haven't decided whether I should remain outside of it or appoint myself to the council and show up to the meetings, but one thing I have decided is to sit in the background. I know that there are some of you out there who shuddered at the thought of me being a part of something that's "yours." You were chosen by the people and teachers to help govern the senior class, and I was not. I can see the look of annoyance on some of your faces even now when I told you about joining the council. Now on the other hand, there were many of you who thought it was a great idea and wanted me to join. The jury is still out as to whether or not I will be joining, but what has been decided is my spot in the shadows.

Mr. Sullivan told us at the end of last year to make this year special. Well as I've said earlier, I have been in a leadership position most of my high school career. I have stolen the spotlight too many times and haven't done it justice. Now it's time for you to take the spotlight back. Based on the circumstances this is my attempt at making the year special. Sitting in the shadows for once. Let's see how it looks.